ok!

oooooooook

lets forget all these damn things about new years costumes

and cermonies

and meeting our reletives

and stuffs like that

just imagin if u were alone as u always dreamed about it

what would u 've done? (i know its wrong gramaticly)

staying over

waitnig for some one to enter the house

watching ovies alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll the time

hang over in ur own house?

i think i would have a neet and tiny house which i could do arts right now

thats funny

because the only thing that i always wish to have the situation and ability and space and material

to do is ART

i love painting

drawing

illustrating

but honestly

i dont have material now

and when i have material

i dont have space

and when i have both there might be an other problem

u know

its sad

imagin that u r a writter without pen and paper

or even a typing machin'

imagin u r cook with out glossory or a oven

imagin u r a taylor (tailor? tailer?) without textile

lol

as i knew it would happen sed reza texted me 2day

in telegram he had sent a congraduation text

and i sent him the thing that i had sent to others

it was obvious

ok

lets forget about it

2day i baked my bro's birthday cake

and he does'n't know it yet

i didnt go to meet grandmaas

my roudness?

yes!

im roud

im selfish

im impolite

this is what it is

i dont go to see my dear lovely aunt

u know

we have an expresion in persian

we say:

تا نباشد چیزکی مردم نگویند چیز ها

so

i believe that some one is lieing here

my mother

my ex-boyfriend

my aunt

or who the hell

his mother?

his aunt?

damn them all

yes

i still remember

i cant forget about these things when im arround them

when im in this city

u know

that ridicules

im done

i dont know

i feel a little in th edge or in top of the edge?

i dont know

but its near to my period time

my sadness' reson is obvious

undenyable

but this is my feeling in new year's day

sadness

lonlyness

dissability to be the one who i like to be

u know

ill see the day who i have place,material and no problem to do art in this year

if u want it

did i toled u that im thinking about art philosephy?

it looks great

for master degree and ph.d

for now

happy new year

29 خرداد 1397...